Lessons in Life and Solar Energy

Yesterday upon picking Abby up from school, I asked her how her day went. She told me they made solar ovens in her enrichment class. She told me how they made them and explained that tomorrow they would be cooking smores in them to see if they worked. Well, last night about bedtime, Abby began complaining of feeling dizzy. For Abby, this can be somewhat of a serious problem. If her heart rate or blood pressure get out of whack she often gets dizzy and lightheaded. However, last night she wasn't really acting dizzy, just saying she was. I gave her a large glass of water and put her to bed. I checked on her once before going to bed myself and she was sleeping soundly with a smooth and regular heartbeat. At 7:00 AM this morning I woke her and the first thing she told me was that she was feeling dizzy. Once again, she wasn't acting dizzy. Her heartbeat was steady and not racing. I had that mother's intuition that for some reason or other she was trying to avoid school. I told her that if she felt she needed to stay home, that was fine but she would miss Nathan's school carnival tonight if she did. She immediately said, "I think I will be able to go to the carnival later though." Bingo!! I asked her what was up and told her I wanted to the truth. She told me a sad story about how she made her solar oven wrong. She explained that when she went to turn it in, she realized she had taped it closed so it wouldn't open and that she had a hole in the back and she was scared it wouldn't work. She was scared that the teacher would get mad that she didn't follow directions, that the other kids would think she was dumb and not want to play with her, and that she would be embarrassed in front of everyone. Well, I was in a tough spot. My first instinct, I admit, was to protect her from being embarrassed. After all, I would have been feeling the exact same way at her age. However, rationality set it quickly. Abby has been so used to going to school and not needing to apply herself and still getting top grades. For three years she has been working at levels below her knowledge. She is now in a school where she needs to apply herself and pay attention or she won't keep up. I realized instantly that saving her from this problem would do her no good at all. I told her that we all make mistakes and that her teacher wouldn't get mad. I told her to ask for help and then explained that she may get a lower grade than she is used to but definately would not get into trouble. I also told her that maybe some of the kids would think it was funny but most would feel bad for her and most would understand what it feels like to have made a mistake. I sent her off to school and as I watched her walk in I felt a stab of regret. However, I am hoping that owning up to this small mistake and seeing that mistakes can always be worked out if we face them head on will help her see that making mistakes is normal and that working them out instead of running from them is definately the better option. Now I am just crossing my fingers that it all works out and that the lesson is learned in as gentle a way as possible!